Have you ever wanted to be a COOL GIRL? (#RememberHighSchool)

Often we’re striving to be a COOL GIRL.

Or, if we manage to be one, we’re fighting like mad to stay one (or praying to God they don’t realize that we aren’t one).

I just worked with a client who thought she “shouldn’t be sad”.

The sadness she feels is (in her words) “Boy Sadness”. (At this point, she thinks her dating life with a particular guy is over).

She doesn’t want to feel her sadness. Instead…

She wants to be like the COOL GIRLS.

Because COOL GIRLS don’t let men have any affect on their happiness and are immune to “Boy Sadness”. They’re not worried about a man not liking them or being judged by men. COOL GIRLS don’t let things like this bother them. (Do COOL GIRLS actually walk the earth?)

MY client doesn’t feel she has social permission to allow her feelings.

So she tries to pretend the sadness isn’t there.
CJ Blaquera, Weight Loss Life Coach for Women

During our session last week, instead of pushing down the sadness with a plate of her favorite comfort food (which she had done the day before), our work was to have her sink into her sadness.To allow it.

There it was in her body waiting for her.

In the back of her throat quivering, in the pressure behind her eyes, and in her “butterfly” stomach.

Sadness raises the question: What must be released?

My client finds this answer:

My expectations of other people to do everything I want them to (insert said “Boy” here) and the pressure to figure everything out right now.

(How genius is Sadness, right?)

Eventually she also realizes this Truth. Rather than “I shouldn’t be sad”:

I am sad.

(And immediately she feels more accepting of herself.)

Being a make-up artist in Los Angeles, my client has seen many “alleged” COOL GIRLS (actresses) on set. We discuss one particular actress (the star of a Fox TV show) who has been mean to the crew.

My client thinks the star is insecure and probably wonders these things in the privacy of her own mind:

I’m not sure I look good enough. (#BeenThere)

I’m not sure my work is good enough. (#DoneThat)

I’m not sure I am good enough. (#DoneThatToo)

What if we didn’t separate ourselves from the COOL GIRLS?

What if we didn’t try so hard to become a COOL GIRL?

What if we didn’t worry about whether others thought we were a COOL GIRL or not and realized that…

We are all: Just. Girls. Period. (Or Just women. Period.)

I am not a Good Girl. A Bad Girl. A COOL GIRL. An Un-Cool Girl.

I am simply…

A Girl.

A Girl with a myriad of emotions that come and go (Each with a specific message of its own).

My client felt some ease in that idea. It took the pressure off.

I am a Girl. (Period).

It opened the way for her to become an Authentic Girl.

And don’t we all – really – want to become THAT Girl.


{Meet CJ Blaquera}

CJ Blaquera | Certified Master Weight Loss Coach for Women | Law of Attraction | Los Angeles

Master Weight Loss Coach for Women

Finding Peace Within (not Within a Piece of Cake)

I help outwardly accomplished women master their internal guidance system so they can succeed at creating their natural weight. Begin by clicking here.